Yo!

Hey dude it's been an age!
I would fill you in on all the stuff I have been doing but quite honestly I have just been bowling along, living a life.
At the moment I am shaking my fist at the TV, it's advertising Aqua Lite shampoo from Pantene. I am often weighed down by my heavy heavy hair. Household chores are almost impossible and having a job type job totally out of the question. Clearly I need to skip down to Bootsesesss The Chemistssss to get me some of that Aqua Lite.

Nightmare......quite literally.

SoOOooo tired this morning, had an epic dream that turned nasty and kept me awake for an hour or so. Very menacing moody look about it like a Guillermo Del Toro movie.... all the stuff I own, mostly shoes, were moving towards me very slowly like they had some magnetic attraction thing going on or WERE UNDER A SPELL, cast by SOME EVIL UNSEEN THING. *shiver* Totally shit myself up.

Too Tight

Dear Lady GaGa,
Unless you have shares in Bob's Brazilian Wax Palace please release your hoohaa from it's sequinned prison. This costume is making my eyes water. Thanks!

Elbow Ache

I haven't died or anything I have just been soooOoOoo busy making stuff that I haven't had a chance to do anything else. The house looks like a bomb has gone off and the children are on the brink of having to crowd around the fridge eating ham with their fingers. I also have the mother of all elbow aches, RSI or some such thing, am becoming fast addicted to paracetamol.
At least I am ok money wise which is great but doing tax returns is bollocks, I don't mind paying what I owe I just hate the admin, I will probably end up employing a pixie to do it for me. Yay!

Tipsy

'Over the road' are having a garage conversion, they have employed a guy who seems to be a bit drunk. He keeps starting up power tools, swaggering about then getting back in his van. By the time he has finished it will have cost twice as much and may not be safe. I think they need to bribe him into proper sober action, maybe with a Ginsters and some strong tea. I have told the kids to keep to this side of the cul de sac until he has gone.

Marrow

I have lots and lots of marrows, they seem to be the most successful crop so far. What can I do with all these marrows?....serious cooking suggestions only please! I have had enough of stuffed marrow in all it's different forms.

Crikey

I guess I am getting old as I haven't stopped jawing on about how this year has flown by, I mean FLOWN by, the children will have finished another school year by Friday. That's fucking mental!
Also I have never been busier, my work is in two national mags next month and I have been preparing for the rush whilst making cakes, growing veg and reading Vogue.
I can't keep up, there aren't enough hours in the day for everything to get done. I suppose I could spend less time pondering, pontificating, reading and rearranging but then life wouldn't be as much fun.