Tomorrow I am going to London to see my friend's exhibition. I haven't seen him in ages, 13 years or so. He has a very very clever, very beautiful girlfriend and a very very successful career in the arts as an agent and artist. I on the other hand have a fat arse and a bad hair-do.
I feel slightly nervous.
Try as I might I can't find an outfit that makes me look anything other than a thrity something My Chemical Romance fan or a aged hooker. My classy Dior eyeshadow set,that I got for Christmas, doesn't give me smoky, sexy eyes, it just makes me look like I have had a scrap with Ricky Hatton.
It seems that my pyjamas and Agent Provocateur fluffy mules are the least offensive things I own.......dear God and Elvis wish me luck.